Let’s talk about dog poop.  I’m dog-sitting Teddy, the neighbor’s dog, while they are away in Europe for the summer.  Rene is teaching a class at the Copenhagen Business School and he took Traci and the boys and Patty joined them for a couple weeks.  That leaves me at home taking care of the rabbits, cats, fish, plants and Teddy. 

For the first week Teddy followed me everywhere.  I couldn’t go to the bathroom without him following me.  It was driving me nuts!  Also, I had to let him outside at regular intervals and late at night and first thing in the morning to do his business (more about this later).  I couldn’t go anywhere without worrying about him being in the house and barking his fool head off until I got back or whatever mischief he might get into.  I was really feeling like a slave to this mutt. 

Then, one morning about 8:AM (I’d already taken him out a couple hours earlier), I was going over to the neighbors to tend to the rabbits and when I opened the door, Teddy scooted out and down the steps and out into the yard into a mama skunk with a couple of kittens.  I mean, it’s not like Teddy had never seen a skunk before, he’d taken a hit from a skunk before and Patty and I had to spend half the night cleaning him up.  He got a pretty strong dose of skunk juice and started running around scooting through dirt and grass trying to rub it off.  I knew what I had to do.  Shoot the dog!  No, that did run through my mind, but since Patty and I had dealt with this before I knew that I needed to quickly neutralize the skunk with hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and dishwashing detergent and I had a supply handy. 

I got it all ready and tried to get Teddy to come to me so I could help him but stupid runs the other way.  I finally cornered him and threw him in the tub and cleaned him up somewhat.  He still smelled but I wasn’t planning on getting all that close to him.  So, ever since then, he acts like I’m the reason he got squirted and he’s scared to death of me.  Still follows me around but not as closely.  A couple days later, I gave him another treatment followed with a baby shampoo and you can barely detect the smell now.  I also had to wash the blankets I used to protect the furniture from him. 

So now I have to put him on a leash to let him outside because I would never be forgiven if I let him out and he never came back.  I was sitting outside on the lawn swing last night talking to Susan on my cell phone and mama skunk and her litter came back into the yard.  If I hadn’t had Teddy on a leash he would have taken off after her.  This dog is so stupid!   I’ve got my slingshot out and if mama skunk comes back I’m going to take potshots at her from the safety of my deck in hopes of discouraging her from hanging around. 

Now, I have to take the dog out to do his business and wait until he does it.  That includes taking him out when it’s dark and avoiding the hazards of former successful poop runs.  It’s agonizing!  The stupid dog has to find just the right place to lift his leg and that entails covering almost every inch of yard and then retracing his steps in some kind of contest between ‘perfect site A’ and ‘perfect site B’.  When we finally get that done, we repeat the process for the perfect dump site.  Then he thinks he’s done something really special and I should give him a treat!   All the other animals and plants are pretty easy to deal with but this dog is a full-time job. 

Another endearing habit this mutt has is lying down next to me and cutting one loose that would peel the paint off the walls.  He’s doing it right now. 

I’ll sure be glad when the neighbors get home. 

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One Comment on “Dog-sitting”

  1. […] CHRONOSPOTS a string of family memories « Dog-sitting […]

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